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The Daughter I Never Had

Long long ago in a galaxy far far away, I was contacted by a troubled youth. We became fast friends only I was old enough to be her mother and she soon began calling me "mommie."

I named her Genevieve to unofficially adopt her and shield her mind from the abuse she was enduring at the hands of her actual mother. I don't believe she still uses this name and it was never her legal name.

We talked a LOT for about nine months. I even began blogging to give her more of me than we could arrange in live conversation due to a significant difference in our time zones.

She was trans and extremely smart. I thus got a crash course in a lot of trans issues and seem to know a lot more than average about the topic though that long-dead relationship is my primary source of information.


I helped her escape her abusive family and it looked sort of like the above clip. She would wish for a thing and I would help her get it and then she would go "You never do ANYTHING for me. I could have done that MYSELF. I even had to pay for it and I didn't even get FRIES!"

I let her get away with pretending that I did nothing for her in part so I could lie low after she escaped. Unlike her other associates, I knew that getting her out would be the start of a long, hard journey, not the end.

This blog was dreamed up as an LGBTQ resource. I started it because the LGBTQ community is at high risk of homelessness.

It didn't work for me to try to write this site as "an LGBTQ resource." Over time, I seem to have found my voice by viewing this as a space for me to talk about dating, relationships, LGBTQ issues, clothes and other topics I might have discussed with, say, a teenaged trans daughter.

In an ideal world, no child -- LGBTQ or otherwise -- would be abused like Genevieve was. I have two biological children who were very challenging to raise and I did not abuse them (though I hear such children are somewhat frequently abused). One of them self identifies as Asexual.

I write about parenting challenging children elsewhere. This is more like a resource for teens and adults who are LGBTQ and didn't have a parent like me.

Please Note

1. This blog is for people with baggage trying to sort their lives. It is NOT for awful people who behave terribly trying to JUSTIFY their awful behavior. If you are looking for excuses and justification for your shitty behavior: Get Off My Lawn.

2. I self identify as not straight. I made that decision at some point in part due to my relationship to Genevieve.

Being open about that is a political position. It is intended to make life easier for people who cannot pass for hetero at all, but the reality is I strongly prefer male attention and for all intents and purposes have lived like a heterosexual woman for over forty years. I have no expectation that there are any girlfriends in my future.

It would be best to view me as a mentor or an advocate for the LGBTQ community and NOT as "a potential girlfriend" because in your mind I'm the only woman you know who is openly not straight.

The reality is you don't actually know me at all so pretending you are going to someday get with me is the perfect excuse to stay in the closet and not do something you find TERRIFYING like get a girlfriend. That makes me a Dream Girl and you a deluded nutter. 


On Reddit

r/GenevieveFiles -- though I haven't posted recently and, hey, if it doesn't get activity soon, Reddit may take away my toys and tell me to go home.

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