The English Bible says "The meek shall inherit the Earth." I have heard that in French it says "The nonchalant shall inherit the Earth."
I grew up in a bilingual home, so if I squint a little, I can see how those are intended to say the same thing but they really don't. I like the French framing vastly better.
Meek reads as spineless. It reads as never standing up for oneself. It comes across like you should let abusive assholes hurt you and then wait for God to set things right because you are so NICE, so you deserve better. In contrast, nonchalant suggests that you should stand up for yourself but without making a stink unnecessarily.
Understand that no matter how polite and reserved you are, if you stand up for yourself, some people will not like it.
What is this post about? It's about The Pronoun Problem.
I am not trans but I do post as openly female on a predominantly male forum. It was about 98 percent male when I originally joined it, so posting as openly female has at times been ridiculous amounts of drama for just not being male.
Over the years, I have thought a lot about how to handle that and have thought a lot about what to do if someone misgenders me in specific. The TLDR is:
This is NOT intended to lecture you and tell you that You are doing it wrong! It is intended as food for thought in hopes of helping you up your game and get betterer results in the future than what you have gotten so far.
I grew up in a bilingual home, so if I squint a little, I can see how those are intended to say the same thing but they really don't. I like the French framing vastly better.
Meek reads as spineless. It reads as never standing up for oneself. It comes across like you should let abusive assholes hurt you and then wait for God to set things right because you are so NICE, so you deserve better. In contrast, nonchalant suggests that you should stand up for yourself but without making a stink unnecessarily.
Understand that no matter how polite and reserved you are, if you stand up for yourself, some people will not like it.
What is this post about? It's about The Pronoun Problem.
I am not trans but I do post as openly female on a predominantly male forum. It was about 98 percent male when I originally joined it, so posting as openly female has at times been ridiculous amounts of drama for just not being male.
Over the years, I have thought a lot about how to handle that and have thought a lot about what to do if someone misgenders me in specific. The TLDR is:
There are better ways for people to learn that I'm a woman than nitpicking nice comments whose only flaw is they assumed I was one of the guys on an overwhelmingly male forum because I fit in so well. That's about the worst possible way to educate people about that detail.And the longer version -- which the above quote is a small snippet of -- can be found here: It Seems My Silence was Heard.
This is NOT intended to lecture you and tell you that You are doing it wrong! It is intended as food for thought in hopes of helping you up your game and get betterer results in the future than what you have gotten so far.