Andrew Wyeth created more than 200 works of art about a neighbor of his named Helga. Many of them were nudes and she was so comfortable being naked around him that in some cases he drew (or painted) her while she was asleep.
He created these works in secret over a period of years and neither his wife nor Helga's husband knew about it at the time. When the works finally went on public display, reporters thrust microphones into the face of Andrew Wyeth's wife and asked her what she saw in these works and she said "Love." and refused to give them the drama they were looking for.
A lot of talk has revolved around this relationship and Wyeth seemingly likes it like that. Different sources give different versions of events but my best understanding is that he remained friends with Helga and she took care of him in his old age when his health was frail.
Many people assume they had an affair. My best understanding is that has never been confirmed.
In my twenties while in therapy wrestling with my personal demons rooted in the unfortunate events of my childhood, I read some book about open relationships. It was research based and only profiled a few couples who agreed to be interviewed for the project.
Most so-called open or polyamorous relationships are good old fashioned "swinging" by an updated, more politically correct name. Of the couples interviewed for the book, only one of them remained together long term.
That couple was an older couple and I believe both had been divorced once already before getting together and simply didn't want to follow a model of monogamy as prison. I think it was the wife who said something like "There is more prositution in marriage than outside of it."
In other words, it was her view that many marriages are essentially a sex for money deal with the man supplying the money and the wife supplying the sex. It's not love or an intimate romantic relationship. It's prostitution prettied up for polite society.
Eventually, this couple stopped sleeping around. They both had serious careers and eventually there were grandkids, etc.
There are only so many hours in the week and there wasn't time for everything, so something had to go and there came a point where what mattered the least to them was casual sex with other people. One of their stated reasons was that they needed to carve out time for each other in their hectic lives.
It wasn't possible for both of them to have careers, time to give to a large family, time for hobbies, time for themselves etc and also time for a relationship to each other while also sleeping around. They wanted a real relationship to each other, so at some point they stopped sleeping around, not because society expected a married couple to be monogamous but because sleeping around no longer mattered to them.
I've read other things where, anecdotally, some couple began with an open relationship and over time found they no longer wanted other people. Other people just dropped off their radar and they stopped seeing them.
In some cases, it was sort of an awkward thing that the couple didn't quite know how to deal with. They had defined the relationship as an open relationship and now they weren't seeing other people -- or one of them wasn't -- and sometimes it was a source of stress, like they felt obligated to keep seeing others and weren't sure what to do about the "problem" that they no longer wished to.
The reality is that it can be hard to figure out what you want or need from a relationship and it can be a moving target. If Andrew Wyeth did have an affair with Helga, perhaps he was wise to keep it on the down low and keep that info to himself in spite of his fame and the world knowing he did so many portraits and sketches of her.
It can be hard enough for two people to sort such questions in their own minds and between themselves without a zillion others butting in with their 2 cents worth.
He created these works in secret over a period of years and neither his wife nor Helga's husband knew about it at the time. When the works finally went on public display, reporters thrust microphones into the face of Andrew Wyeth's wife and asked her what she saw in these works and she said "Love." and refused to give them the drama they were looking for.
A lot of talk has revolved around this relationship and Wyeth seemingly likes it like that. Different sources give different versions of events but my best understanding is that he remained friends with Helga and she took care of him in his old age when his health was frail.
Many people assume they had an affair. My best understanding is that has never been confirmed.
In my twenties while in therapy wrestling with my personal demons rooted in the unfortunate events of my childhood, I read some book about open relationships. It was research based and only profiled a few couples who agreed to be interviewed for the project.
Most so-called open or polyamorous relationships are good old fashioned "swinging" by an updated, more politically correct name. Of the couples interviewed for the book, only one of them remained together long term.
That couple was an older couple and I believe both had been divorced once already before getting together and simply didn't want to follow a model of monogamy as prison. I think it was the wife who said something like "There is more prositution in marriage than outside of it."
In other words, it was her view that many marriages are essentially a sex for money deal with the man supplying the money and the wife supplying the sex. It's not love or an intimate romantic relationship. It's prostitution prettied up for polite society.
Eventually, this couple stopped sleeping around. They both had serious careers and eventually there were grandkids, etc.
There are only so many hours in the week and there wasn't time for everything, so something had to go and there came a point where what mattered the least to them was casual sex with other people. One of their stated reasons was that they needed to carve out time for each other in their hectic lives.
It wasn't possible for both of them to have careers, time to give to a large family, time for hobbies, time for themselves etc and also time for a relationship to each other while also sleeping around. They wanted a real relationship to each other, so at some point they stopped sleeping around, not because society expected a married couple to be monogamous but because sleeping around no longer mattered to them.
I've read other things where, anecdotally, some couple began with an open relationship and over time found they no longer wanted other people. Other people just dropped off their radar and they stopped seeing them.
In some cases, it was sort of an awkward thing that the couple didn't quite know how to deal with. They had defined the relationship as an open relationship and now they weren't seeing other people -- or one of them wasn't -- and sometimes it was a source of stress, like they felt obligated to keep seeing others and weren't sure what to do about the "problem" that they no longer wished to.
The reality is that it can be hard to figure out what you want or need from a relationship and it can be a moving target. If Andrew Wyeth did have an affair with Helga, perhaps he was wise to keep it on the down low and keep that info to himself in spite of his fame and the world knowing he did so many portraits and sketches of her.
It can be hard enough for two people to sort such questions in their own minds and between themselves without a zillion others butting in with their 2 cents worth.
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